Monday, May 01, 2023

Don't Look Now, but the Mermaids are Back.


The more you do this kind of work, the more you realize that dissociating and depersonalizing the psyches of young people has been a top cryptocratic priority for at least the last decade or so. 

And with stage-9 wokeinoma driving superheroes and other dissociative fantasies into utter commercial oblivion, the Mermaids are coming back up for air.

The Sirens haven't been singing much these past few years, in part because of the Crowned and Conquering Virus (Mermaidery is an outdoorsy kind of LARP). But with summer coming, the Mermaid Apocalypse is back, baby. 

This, from Italy:
The curvy statue of a mermaid in the square of a fishing village has been criticised for being "very vulgar". Students at the Luigi Rossi art school in Monopoli in Puglia, Italy created the statue before it was placed in a town square. It has since been ridiculed on social media as many say they are "perplexed" by its design. 
One wrote on Facebook: "Very ugly and vulgar, seeing that the only known little mermaid (Amsterdam) doesn’t have hair but only the fin - It’s a shame it could have been more graceful." Another wrote:" A sickening image of a woman."


Right on schedule, Wokewashing rides to the rescue of what - both ironically and refreshingly - is an unambiguously feminine idol:

Adolfo Marciano, the headteacher of the art school, has defended the statue saying it was a “tribute to the great majority of women who are curvy”. He also explained that the town's mayor asked the students to create several statues, including one with a sea-like theme. He told the Guardian: "The students got together and came up with the idea of a mermaid.

“The council was shown the scale model and said it was good, and then decided the completed sculpture would be placed in the square.”

Marciano said the work should be viewed “as a representation of reality, in this case of the female body”.

But as you've read in these pages before, these public displays are not about art for art's sake, but about art for religion's sake. And this one hits all the bases. 

First, let's obey the laws:


Whenever a controversy over symbolism erupts in the media, it's usually disguising a completely different symbolic message altogether.


The old state cults will be re-established under the cover of Woke.


The old statues and symbols currently being torn down will eventually be replaced by the icons and idols of the new/old state cult.

So let's take a deeper dive as to what that Mer-Mania is really all about. All you regulars out there know what time it is, but here's a mini-history lesson for newbies. 

Mermaiding isn't just about fantasy figures, it's about an old and extremely well-established religion:


Atargatis (known as Derceto by the Greeks) was the chief goddess of northern Syria in Classical antiquity. Primarily she was a fertility goddess, but, as the baalat ("mistress") of her city and people she was also responsible for their protection and well-being. Her chief sanctuary was at Hierapolis, modern Manbij, northeast of Aleppo, Syria.

Michael Rostovtzeff called her "the great mistress of the North Syrian lands". Her consort is usually Hadad. As Ataratheh, doves and fish were considered sacred to her: doves as an emblem of the Love-Goddess, and fish as symbolic of the fertility and life of the waters.  

She is sometimes described as a mermaid-goddess, due to identification of her with a fish-bodied goddess at Ashkelon. 

And as it happens, another widespread dissociative social trend - that absolute knobs will try to convince you is progressive and futuristic - is actually old as dirt too:

During the Roman era, eunuch priests worshipped Atargatis, similar to the Galli priests of Cybele. At the shrine in Hieropolis founded by Semiramis, eunuch priests served the image of a fish-tailed woman. 

Rituals to the goddess were accompanied by flute playing and rattle shaking. In one rite, young males castrated themselves to become cross-dressing priests at the temple and thereafter performed tasks usually done by women. The obligatory lake or pond lay nearby, full of sacred fish which no one was allowed to eat; nor could anyone eat Atargatis's sacred doves.

Starting to get the picture? Because this priesthood used to tour around and perform the same kinds of shows you can find in any city in America these days. 

Well, more or less:

The priests were described by Apuleius as mendicants that traveled around with an image of the goddess dressed in a silken robe on the back of a donkey. When they arrived at village squares or a receptive estate they would perform an ecstatic rite, designed to attract a crowd and elicit their contributions. 

The priests were described as effeminate, wearing heavy makeup, turbans on their heads, and dressed in saffron colored robes of silk and linen; some in white tunics painted with purple stripes. They shouted and danced wildly to the music of flutes, whirling around with necks bent so that their long hair flew out; and in an ecstatic frenzy they would bite their own flesh and cut their arms with knives until they bled.

Haven't yet found evidence they did story hours as well, but it's just a matter of time. Let's just say there isn't any evidence they didn't and leave it at that.

I don't know if the new Atargatians are having trouble enlisting new recruits (I can't imagine they would) but just in case, Netflix (of course) swoops into save the day: 

"Queer Eye" producer dives into mermaid culture for Netflix "MerPeople"


Access your favorite topics in a personalized feed while you're on the go. The creators of "Queer Eye" are turning their lens on the world of underwater performers for a new docu-series on Netflix, "MerPeople."

Premiering May 23, "MerPeople" is a four-part docuseries that chronicles people who have turned their love for the mystical sea creatures into real-world careers. 

"From putting on dazzling small-town shows in Florida to the crowning of the King and Queen of the Seas in the Bahamas, this series will take you on a journey of passion and perseverance," Netflix writes. 

As as we've seen time and time again in the past, Mermaid schools are popping up all across the world. Just in time for summer, at least in the north:

We all dreamed of being the Little Mermaid as kids. Or spent hours in the pool trying to wiggle our legs to swim like one.

Well, if that dream has followed you into adult life, why not try one of PADI’s (Professional Association of Diving Instructors) mermaid training courses? Anyone over the age of six can start their mermaid journey, and learn to breath-hold, swim with a tail, read ocean conditions, and respect and protect marine life.

What is mermaiding?

Combining elements of freediving with wearing a ‘monofin’ or mermaid tail, the art of ‘mermaiding’ is an exciting new way to explore beneath the ocean’s surface. 

“It’s a challenge physically, it’s also a challenge mentally to be able to unplug and be quiet and listen - but when you do, you realise that it’s so worth it,” says Julie Andersen, PADI global brand director and mermaid instructor. 

"Socially-conscious" causes are always a good way to promote your new/old religion and Mermaidianity is no different. Well, at least this is a fairly worthy one:

A swimmer known as "Mermaid Merle" took a record-breaking 30-mile swim in Florida while wearing a monofin.

Merle Liivand, who earned the nicknames "Mermaid Merle" and "Eco Mermaid" for her swims to promote ocean conservation, swam 30 miles in Miami's Biscayne Bay while wearing a monofin, a swimming fin resembling a mermaid's tail. 

Liivand said she collected about 20 pounds of trash from the bay during her 14-hour, 15-minute swim. A total 35 pounds of trash were collected by Liivand and her support team. The swimmer broke the Guinness World Record for farthest swim with a monofin, which she previously set at 26.22 miles in 2022.

More where that came from. Note the distinct mermaid palette; makes me wonder if there's a Mermaid pride flag. 

Probably is.


Disney's been stumbling from failure to failure as of late, and some believe the race-swapped Little Mermaid live-action remake will continue their losing streak. I really don't care one way or the other, since Hollywood is on its very last legs anyhow. It's long outlived its usefulness, same as opera, three-ring circuses and Vaudeville.

And besides, this particular actress doesn't seem all that miscast in any case, given that she has a bit of the old "Innsmouth look." Wouldn't you agree?

And the Barbie movie is throwing in some Atargatianity, with Dua Lipa starring as a mermaid. There's been a lot of, um, speculation about this one, but I'm actually agnostic. Let's revisit the topic in a few years.

Dave Chappelle once complained about how Hollywood likes to emasculate black men, but he was only half-right. The truth is that the Hollyworms methodically emasculate all men - at least, unambiguously masculine men - as you'll probably see in the Barbie movie.


Celebrities have long been drafted to help push the Mer-memes on the rubes, especially celebrity musicians. And this time, Brother JB's personal muse Florence Welch is next up to bat:

Last Friday, English indie rock band Florence + the Machine propelled listeners down to new depths with the release of their latest haunting single, “Mermaids.” Cut from the group’s fifth LP “Dance Fever,” the song now joins the album’s “complete edition” nearly a year after its initial release.

The group, led by London-born singer Florence Welch, teased its newest single two weeks prior to its release in a 21-second clip of Welch in a candle-lit bathtub sporting a glimmering mermaid tail and singing the song’s first verse. 

The clip ends with Welch slowly submerging completely underwater as the music intensifies.

Katy Perry has been rocking the fishtails for nearly her entire professional career and has been dunked back in the drink now that Mermaids are back on the menu. She's probably a lot more agreeable to play paperdoll again now that her star has considerably dimmed.

I've never heard of The Aquadolls and judging from their YouTube, neither has anyone else. From what I can tell they're just one of trillions of undistinguished pop-punk bands still  slogging it out in the clubs and I can't rightly say why they call their style "Mermaid Rock." 

But whatever, right?

Nineties sex symbol Rosario Dawson is definitely not an also-ran pop punk band, but she is a pretty decent singer. She also seems to have some kind of deal with Disney. So I'm guessing maybe she was tasked with helping spread the mer-memes in anticipation of The Little Mermaid. 

And she does hit all the transformative talking points:

Dawson adds, "As a Coney Island girl, you'll forever be a mermaid at heart, navigating nurture and nature, your transformations constantly affirming everything that excites you about the world — that it is as magical as you can wish, dream and believe."

"You will be overwhelmed many times for all of the stunning ways you get to embody this life," she concludes. "Seeing with awe, loving and playing: Those will all be your superpowers. Love, Rosario."

And then this, the less said about which the better:

Alana “Honey Boo Boo” Thompson was shining bright on prom night!

On Friday, the reality star shared a series of glamorous photos from the special occasion, which was held in her Georgia hometown last weekend.

The 17-year-old dazzled in a bubblegum pink mermaid gown that was covered in sequins and intricate detailing. She completed her look with sky-high heels, a glittering necklace and earrings, and a glamorous half-updo.

I'm not sure who Megha ("Pearly") Prasad is, but far as I can tell she's awful easy on the eyes. Seems to be some kind of influencer, who I'd imagine are prime targets for Atargatian advertising recruitment. 


We've talked about how festivals are by definition innately religious phenomena, and the widespread proliferation of Mermaid Festivals - even in wholly-landlocked locations - certainly speaks to that.

Here's one of those:

Mermaid Festival Cutie King & Queen Contest, Parade Details Released

NORTH WEBSTER - The North Webster Lions Club is prepping for the 77th annual Mermaid Festival Cutie King and Queen Contest and Cutie Parade. 

As part of the annual tradition, all children vying for either the king or queen title must participate in the Cutie Parade, which is slated from 6:30 to 7:30 p.m. June 21.

While the parade is a requirement to participate in the Cutie Pageant, the parade is open to all children under the age of 14 as of June 1. 

A "Cutie Pageant," speaking of Netflix. I don't know what that's all about and I probably don't want to. But even this early in the season you're already seeing a whole smorgasbord of Sirenly shindigs taking place all over the place. 

Here's just a small sampling...

There are much bigger and more established mermaid-parades on the way, particularly the Coney Island one. With comic conventions dying one after the other it will be interesting to see if fishtivals take up the dissociation-inducing slack.


As the name implies, Mermaids UK has been a major force for the neo-Atargatian enlistment drive. Unfortunately, they're apparently so outrageously corrupt that they brought down the big, bad Tavistock Gender Institute down with them:

The NHS Tavistock gender clinic has been threatened with court action by the information regulator after failing to reveal its relationship with Mermaids.

The Trust claimed in response to Freedom of Information requests from a parent that it “does not hold” emails or minutes of meetings between staff and the controversial charity, which has been accused of putting pressure on staff to transition children.

The matter was referred to the Information Commissioner’s Office (ICO) which has now ruled that “on the balance of probabilities”, the Trust does have relevant emails. Mermaids has previously accidentally published emails between Susie Green, then chief executive of the charity, and some of Tavistock’s staff.  

The Tavistock and Portman NHS Foundation Trust has until the end of this week to conduct fresh searches and provide a new response or the ICO could write to the High Court and the issue “may be dealt with as a contempt of court”.  

Either way, the very existence of Mermaids UK is proof of concept when it comes to the Atargatian revival and its larger impact on the culture at large.

Oh, by the way; you saw how Atargatis is the consort of Hadad, right? Well, you probably know him better as "Ba'al Hadad." 

Ring a bell?

How about now?


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