Thursday, December 13, 2018

Annihilation Reality: Pray for Us Shimmers

Well, we're coming up on awards season. As of yet, I haven't seen the chilling docudrama Annihilation nominated for any major awards. Maybe it shouldn't have been so closely associated with Netflix or maybe it should have just dropped the "dramatization" bit and done a straight documentary. 

Or maybe gone a little lighter on the dubsteb sound effects, I don't know.

However, as a based-on-real-events deal Annihilation is one hell of a lot more realistic than Black Hawk Down or Zero Dark Thirty could dream of ever being. But what good is realism when reality itself is constantly being overwritten?

If you haven't seen it (or don't read the news), Annihilation is a sci-fi (sic) film about an alien intelligence that crash-lands in a Florida swamp and begins turning the joint into a Cocteau Twins record cover  terraforming the landscape and fauna in order to suit its own needs.

Petite Natalie Portman plays an Army veteran (I know, I know; typecasting) who gears up with gang of similarly tiny gal-pals, and ventures into the swamp to try to find out what happened to the Special Forces squad (which includes the Portman character's husband) who disappeared there. This is where the film really strives for cinema verite-type realism. Why do I say that?

Because, as you all know, when a bunch of hardened professional killers go missing somewhere, the go-to strategy for the military is always to find the wispiest waifs they can possibly get their mitts on and drop them into a killing zone to find out what's what. 

Sync-fully, the diminutive Ariana Grande (widely rumored to be a Sister in the Clandestine Bene Frasserit, AKA a "Crypto-Frase") managed to play with the film's iconography (and color palate) in her music video for "The Voice of  God is a Woman."

According to reports, Grande Bestia said she was too busy to appear in Annihilation herself. Not to burst her adorable little bubble, but I heard rumors that she was a bit too zaftig for the producers. Forget where.

Maybe TMZ.

Of course, the real-life Shimmer isn't quite so photogenic as its Hollywood counterpart; it usually manifests one color at a time, not in snazzy prism effects. Not always, but usually.

As we saw last year in Europe and the UK as well as over the skies of Florida after the hurricanes. So I suppose it's feasible that FLA is the epicenter of the Shimmer contagion, but my own guess would be in the OZ-NZ regions.

Or elsewhere.

"Steve," so named because the Shimmer is actually sentient, may hew a little closer to the Hollywood version, but experts are still trying to hash that out.

We've also seen the Shimmer lighting up the night surf, even if so-called "scientists" (read: "panic-suppression agents") blame the luminescence on "red tides."

The Shimmer also popped up over the Phillippines early in the year, horrifying onlookers.

But who among us wouldn't be horrified if the sky turned into Deep Purple?

This display here was more akin to the Hollywood Shimmer, but as we'll see, the real-life version might have a different color story in mind.

And that's white or albino, as we see here in Nova Scotia.

And our new friend "Shimmy" is not only albino but iridescent like the movie Shimmer.

And apparently not all that rare. Annihilation doesn't seem to fully commit to the albino motif, but we certainly see prominent examples of it.

But we're seeing a lot more albinism as the real Shimmer continues to spread. 

Pretty soon this stuff won't be "rare" at all. It will be quite well-done, actually.

However, the film does give us a gander at these little chums here. The one one the right is particularly scientifically-accurate.

As you see here...

...and here...

...and here...

...and here...

...and here.

In distant-but-related Shims, we see this white giraffe...

...and this white porcupine.

Do note that we saw a similar color-scheme (as well as all the Shimmer you can handle) in the Spanish National Lottery's entrainment propaganda, Danielle.

Not-coincidentally, the same colors are also "Mermaid colors," for some entirely arbitrary reason.

I don't know for sure if Hogweed is Shim-jacent, but it sure as heck sounds like it. Plus, X-Files. Plus, Day of the Triffids.

Either way, the Shimmer is cooking up all kinds of new critters in the kitchen, including these little hippocampi here.

I just recently realized that seahorses and the Kelpie are symbolically the same, not only from an objective POV but in the overall context of Advanced-Particle Frasics.  

No comment here, but do note the rate of spontaneous Shimmerization seems to be increasing. Plus, LOTR. 

The Shimmer also gave us a new Wolf in the Breast...

...and a shimmy Siren from Reticulum.

While on the subject of Pythia, we also have this unsettling story emerging from the SGZ (Shimmer Ground Zero)...

...and Indonesia.

And from the other SGZ, or SGZS ("Shimmer Ground Zero South"), this unsettling development.

And as usual we're seeing all kinds of hellish nightmares being belched forth from the Abyss, like this little dose of nightmare fuel. Check this out: They tried to pass this abomination off as a ray. Can you believe it?

Man, I would not want to be a media and/or science shill in the next few years. I don't care how many people the Cylons deplatform. Imagine trying to foist off that kind of shit with a straight face? I couldn't do it.

Alex Garlands-Evergreen (director of Annihilation) may have been read in on these creatures when he had this mutant alligator pop out of the water. It's hard to say anymore.

But albino alligators have been around for a while, probably due to some advance recon probe the Shimmer folks sent out some time back. There was even a crappy 90s heist flick going by the name, directed by the now-disgraced Kevin "Little" Spacey.

But the Sea-Shimmer is really working over time, even producing a mutant human-like creature.

As well as other disturbing-ass horrors like this...

...and this...

...and these.

On the plus side, we're also seeing some darn cute little fellas swimming around down there, like this day-glo chum. 

You see, the Shimmer isn't necessarily evil, it simply has a strong survival instinct. Unlike a sizable chunk of earthlings.

A lot of folks got excited thinking this pic might be of Nessie, but I think we all know better.

That's right; it's just the Scottish Shimmer, probably serving up a fresh Kelpie.

And the Shimmer is also messing with amphibious species, so get used to these kind of headlines too.

Wait; doctors seriously aren't sure how this lung shaped blood clot got coughed up intact? 

Just another reason Annihilation should be required viewing at Med schools.

Especially since the Shimsters are programming their hellbeasts with an upsetting new feature...

... and of course that's self-replication. 

And it's not just for arthropods...

It looks like the monitor lizard is getting in on the act. 

Quick; someone phone up William Hurt!

And because there aren't enough horrors already it looks like hammerhead sharks are getting in on the auto-cloning hijinks as well. 

Couldn't something cute and fluffy clone itself? What the actual fuck, Shimmer? 

I don't know if this is necessarily Shim-jacent, but hippocampi are now reappearing in the new Nile, AKA the River Isis (no, seriously) AKA the Thames.

Found in the waters between Greenwich (home of the Millennium Dome) and the Southbank Centre (home of the Royal Festival hall)? My, whatever could be the connection for these little micro-Kelpies making such an unlikely comeback? 

It's a real puzzler, I'll tell you.

Maybe we should ask her.

If you've seen Annihilation then you probably already realize that the "tell" on being possessed by an alien intelligence are-- wait for it-- BFEs.

I guess they ran out of CGI money because those babies aren't even a patch on the real BFEs.

If you have any links or tips as to the Shimmer's progress in 2018, be sure to share it with the class.