Thursday, April 02, 2009

Barackobamun in Baden-Baden

Barackobamun is in Europe, and the press is alight with prefab stories on "tension" between the US and its NATO allies. Which, of course, automatically means that everyone will be giving each other backrubs and handjobs all week. These stories are for the benefit of the rubes back home.

One of his stops will be in the resort town of Baden Baden, right off of the Autobahn. Just outside of Baden Baden (in fact it's right off the exit for the town) is the not-so-world famous Autobahnkirche, officially known as St. Christophorous.

Yeah, that's it. The pyramid. Because the first thing I think of when I hear the word "church" is a pyramid. But the design is the least strange thing about this house of worship.

The grounds are just as interesting. There are four obelisks, set to the cardinal points and "the Abraham Gate" at the entrance, all done in an architectural style I believe is called "Early Annunaki."

Boy, don't those columns just fill you up with the Holy Spirit? I like the big compass at the top of this one. There's a very interesting figure at the bottom- the church calls him Molech, but I prefer to call him "Optimus Subprime."

It's a giant with the head of an automobile. Someone call Michael Bay. And then call Erich Von Daniken.

The inside is just as interesting. This is the crypt- note the octagonal skylight. Lots more of those Babylon-looking reliefs everywhere as well. Not the least bit creepy.

Then there are some interesting stained glass windows that make the Denver Airport murals look like Norman Rockwell. Fascinating stuff.

Let's keep an eye on the news. It will be fascinating if Barackobamun goes to mass here.

Thanks to an anonymous tipster.